Crock Pot Scorecard

I recently purchased a crockpot because it was on the end of the aisle at the store and it only cost $12. TWELVE DOLLARS!! If I had known crockpots were so cheap I would have been enjoying hearty stews and tender vegetables for years now. I assumed that they were, like, $50 because that is the dollar amount that I assign to things of that size.

Here are the things that I have made so far, followed by a score:

RICE PUDDING:
This recipe was on the very back of the crockpot manual, and I magically had everything that was required, such as rice, eggs, sugar, and other stuff. Also, it only took 4 hours!
Pros:

• Had all of the stuff
• Only took 4 hours
• Sounds delicious

Cons:

• Dry
• Flavorless
• Looked kinda gross

Score: 2.5

BOSTON BAKED BEANS:
This recipe was also in the crockpot instruction manual.
Pros:

• Used some of the dry beans I bought while drunk shopping
• Used some of the ham hocks I had in my freezer for some reason
• Contains bacon
• I actually ate it all!

Cons:

• Took 2 hours to soak the stupid beans, then 12 hours to cook
• Ham hocks disintegrated into little chunks of bone that hurt my teeth
• Made my kitchen smell kind of funny

Score: 7.5

POT OF RANDOM CRAP I FOUND IN MY FREEZER:
The allure of the crockpot is the ability to whip up a mean stew or hearty dish of goodness from scratch, using what resources are available to you. This was my first attempt.
Pros:

• Used two bags of freezer-burned veggies that I was probably never going to use
• Used the last of the mysterious ham hocks
• Used 4 potatoes and 2 onions of indeterminate age
• I got to pretend I was a cook by pouring spices and junk into a pot

Cons:

• I spilled a bunch of it
  
• Turned out gross
  
• Accidentally left it in my work fridge and now am scared to open it

Score: 2

Thus, the average score of my crockpot thus far is a 4.