Tuesday, April 28, 2009

MY INTERNAL DIALOG IS ALL-CAPS TODAY

Oh man, so Heenkenstein and I saw My Bloody Valentine last night, and I seriously can't hear today. It was the second loudest show I have ever subjected my fragile hearing organs to, following only that one Kinski show at the Crocodile where I'm pretty sure my skull changed shape. At one point last night I was convinced that I was going to get a bloody nose just from the sheer wall of noise and that all of my arm hair was going to vibrate off.

Since neither of us could hear anything after the show, Kyle and I basically had to yell at each other all the way home, which definitely added an exciting new dimension to our typical intellectual banter. However, the yelling and the "WHAT? WHAT DID YOU SAY?"s made a lot of sense when it was between two similarly afflicted parties, but this morning I realized that my newfound lack of hearing was also causing me to shout everything, including my internal dialog. To get an idea of what this feels like, you should just pretend that everything you are reading is being yelled at you, but you still can't quite hear some things, so you have to ask yourself, "WHAT? WHAT WAS THAT?" Every once in a while.

I can tell this is going to be a really productive day.

ANYWAY, I am super pleased to announce that as her prize for such a comprehensive and cohesive review, which tickled the fancies of billions of people and showed children the true meaning of Christmas and taught robots how to feel love, Sara will be recieving a dramatic LEGO reenactment of that one year that she and I and four other people lived together in a crappy tiny apartment right next to the freeway! In the future, when she gathers all thirty of her children around her in a multi-tiered semicircle to tell them her story, Sara will simply have to produce this stunning reenactment before their hungry eyes, and they will know their heritage.

I am pretty stoked about this, mostly because I actually mananged to secure some LEGO Brand Dramatic Reenactment Blocks! I think the past might have to be rewritten to include some exciting spaceship battles that end with everything exploding and then reforming into little cars that only seat one bald person. Which is totally plausible, considering the other random stuff that happened during that year.

Alright, Grant out.